Mining for Precious Parenting Moments
Choosing to "be there" for our children feels possible yet impossible.
I love my child (even when he insists on not wearing anything, peeing on the floor and stamping on it; oh, and then putting his pee-hands all over me) and I hate being screamed at, ignored and kicked by him.
My love causes me to turn off the TV and eat with him together on his toddler table, while other moments tempt me to run for the hills to be alone (away from the emotion-based world of of family life).
How do I cope? How do we all cope as parents? I don't know!
I try and recognise that's enough.
Personally, I believe that there's always more to be learnt about my child - it helps, a great deal, that I love learning - that each moment is precious yet fleeting.
A metaphor for this (that's given birth as I'm writing now) could be of mining. Let's say that within each stage of my child's life there is some gold to be discovered. And mining for that gold involves being there with my child. It means not getting caught up with housework or distracted watching another TV series. All of which, are generally, one could say, excuses for not being there, let's keep it real, eh?
So the more I spend in the mine, mining, THE MORE I increase the potential and probability of experiencing those precious golden moments.
Though, mining is.... I hate to say it... usually hard work i.e. there's plenty of shovelling to go around. Although, sharing the digging with another parent makes it much easier!
Being a dad and having long periods of time in the mine, is hard work.
Looking for gold sometimes seems fruitless when all I seem to find is more and more dirt.
Dirt is the mundane experiences of no letting him have his own way, changing his soiled (going with the mining theme) nappy and making him the same meals.
Every. Single. Day.
He won't eat anything else, and watching the same predictable television kids programmes repeatedly.
So invite your SO, co-parent, family or friends to dig with you (it'll make it easier and possibly more fun).